I am Really a Superstar

The landlady auntie did not cook for Zhang Ye anymore. He grabbed something to fill his stomach before going online to transfer 100,000 Yuan to his father. It was an instantaneous transaction. After the transfer was made, his mum called him with her cellphone.

“Son, did you transfer money to your dad?” his mum asked with some surprise.

“Yes, my royalty fees have been paid, so I transferred 100,000 over to spend first.” Zhang Ye said like he was a nouveau riche, “When you finish spending it, you can ask me for more! We are not short on money!”

“You are really my good son.” Mom said happily, “Is the money for me or your dad?”

Zhang Ye did not know to cry or laugh, “Isn’t it the same who I give it to? Alright, alright, it’s for you.”

Mom seemed to be showing off at Dad on the other side of the phone, “Heard that? Our son is giving it to me. Don’t you touch the money. In a while, I’ll go buy some jewelry. Our family has been suffering for so many years, and we have finally reversed our situation. Ha, my son is indeed capable. Mom did not work for nothing by feeding you through sh*t and pee!”

So, I grew up being fed sh*t and pee?

Then everyone, please be careful when you are close to me!

Recalling how others talk about their youth, they would say stuff like, “thinking back to my innocent childhood”, and then say how it was, but when it was my turn, it’s “thinking back to my days of being fed sh*t and pee childhood”? Just this impressive opening speech would make people listen to his childhood stories with their noses pinched!

Zhang Ye grumbled to himself a little, then finished up the conversation with his mother before taking an afternoon nap.

……

In his dreamlike state.

Bang, bang, bang. Someone was knocking on the door.

“Brother!”

“Brother, open the door!”

“We know you are home!”

Zhang Ye was awoken by three chattering voices. He knew from their voices at once that they were his cousins, “Coming, coming!” After putting on his clothes, he went to open the door.

three nice-smelling girls streamed into the room.

The slightly more reserved eldest sister, Cao Dan, stuck out her tongue, “Brother, I was pulled over by the both of them.”

The second sister, Cao Tong, smiled and put her arms over Zhang Ye’s shoulder, “We heard from First Aunty about your new book. It earned a few million?”

“Is that so? Why do I not know about it?” Zhang Ye played dumb. He thought to himself that he had been utterly defeated by his mum. His mum’s loud mouth was really strong. Oh, it’s only been an hour and the secret is out? Did everyone in the family find out, too?

The third sister, Cao Mengmeng, pouted cutely, “Brother, you are already a big time author. How can you be so stingy? We already know and you still don’t want to admit it?” She shamelessly sat down on Zhang Ye’s bed, not even removing her shoes before she laid down, “I don’t care. In any case, I want the newest model of a Phoenix laptop, the ultra thin type. If you don’t buy it for me, I will not leave.” She rascally kicked her feet in the air.

Phoenix laptop? It should be a brand of this world, since Zhang Ye has never heard of it.

Cao Tong also laid down on the bed, “I’m not leaving either. I want an OC business class laptop!”

“Their eldest sister, Cao Dan, looked at Zhang Ye and coughed, “Brother, I also lack a laptop. Any type is fine, as long as it’s usable.”

Zhang Ye seemingly scammed, “Sure. If you aren’t leaving, I will.”

“Brother, you are bullying us!” Cao Mengmeng’s eyes turned red. Don’t even mention that acting, “When I go back, I will tell First Aunt and Uncle that you bullied us!”

When a hard stance doesn’t work, try the soft way.

Zhang Ye was just the type to fall for emotional blackmail, “What are you doing? What are you crying for!”

Cao Mengmeng said with tearful eyes, “You are earning so much money, yet you won’t even spend some to buy things for your sisters. Aren’t you ashamed to be our brother? Not ashamed?”

The hypocrite rascal Cao Tong also joined in the pitiful nagging, “Brother……”

Cao Dan, witnessing it all, said, “Why not you buy it for them both; they need it for their studies. Forget about me.”

“I can tell that you three are here to rob me.” Zhang Ye laughed bitterly. He knew that he could not escape this, so he said, “Alright, alright. Buy it; I will reimburse you all!”

Cao Mengmeng immediately stopped crying and jumped in excitement, “Long live Brother!”

Cao Tong had wanted to buy a laptop since a long time ago. She went over to give Zhang Ye a peck on his cheeks, “I love you to death, Brother! My sister is included too, right?”

“Yes, yes. There’s one for everyone.” Zhang Ye helplessly said.

The three sisters were all very happy at this time. They hugged together and cheered!

Zhang Ye was also happy to see them so joyful. They quickly pulled him out of the house to go with them to the mall to buy the laptops.

Sigh, I can’t help it that I’m their brother. Let’s go!

……

At Yintai Mall beside Jiaomen subway.

“Brother, this is the laptop that I want!”

“Buy.”

“Brother, that is the one I want.”

“Buy.”

“Brother, I want this laptop.”

“……Buy.”

“Brother, can I also have a bag? It’s only 800. Not really that expensive.”

“………….Buy.”

“Brother, I would like a pair of sunglasses and also, you are now a famous author; you will need one too. This is a unisex design. One for you and one for me, okay?”

“……………..Buy.”

Outside the mall, the three sisters had theirs arms full and took the subway home.

Zhang Ye’s mouth complained, but he did not feel sorry at all. He was more capable now, so taking care of his little sisters was the normal thing to do. He was really not feeling sorry, only that his heart was bleeding a little. This trip had cost him over 10,000. The blood was splashed all over!

These three prodigal women!

I will definitely not let them enter the door in the future!

Wearing his new sunglasses, Zhang Ye wandered around in the streets. He walked until he came upon a large 4S shop. (4S – Sales, spare parts, service, survey. An integrated auto shop.) Zhang Ye no longer wanted to buy a house. Although he was usually stingy, there were things that he wanted only the best of. For example: a house. He couldn’t buy a large one with only five million. It wasn’t too bad where he stayed now, so why not be a little cautious? But a car? That he had the capability to buy. It would be more convenient and besides, he will be starting work at the TV station in a few days, either as a guest or a host of a show. If he were to continue taking public transport, that would somewhat be belittling his status.

He went inside.

A female shop assistant came over, “Sir, which price range of a car would you like to look at?”

“Show me around. I want to see if there’s any I like, thank you.” Zhang Ye had a passion for cars. He was a man, after all. He was all excited since stepping foot in here.

“Sure. This way, please.” The female shop assistant in her high heels said, “What do you think of this sedan model? It’s an imported Reizi, top of the range. 4T, and is selling very well right now.”

Reizi?

What the hell was that brand!

Zhang Ye waved his hands, “I don’t really like it.”

“How about this model? It’s a J-Bond, imported from Europe. It’s a seven seater, very suitable for the family outings. It is very spacious. It’s also very suitable for businesses.” The shop assistant introduced.

J-Bond?

Why don’t you call it a Durex instead!

Zhang Ye continued to shake his head. He was not interested in this world’s new car manufacturers. Although these brands may not be “new”, Zhang Ye still had totally no concept of them. He still preferred the manufacturers of his old world, maybe because he was nostalgic, or because he was used to them. Or maybe even because those were the only things that reminded Zhang Ye that he did not truly belong in this world.

Eh! He saw it!

BMW! There’s “Don’t Touch Me” (Bie Mo Wo) over here, too!

Upon going further over to the other side, he saw the logo of Mercedes-Benz, too!

There weren’t many brands that this shop was selling, so he could only find two brands that were exactly the same as the ones back in his world, “What about the BMW?” He wanted to know whether BMW was also a high-end manufacturer here.

The female shop assistant blinked, “BMW is an international brand, but it’s quite expensive.” She looked at Zhang Ye’s dressing, obviously thinking that Zhang Ye could not afford it.

“Can you tell me more about it?” Zhang Ye didn’t mind.

The female shop assistant said okay and pointed at one of them, “This is the BMW 3 series, recommended selling price is 320,000, but there’s a promotion right now and the price is lower by 10,000. This is the BMW 5 series…..”

After understanding the situation, Zhang Ye found out that the BMW here and the BMW from his world were almost exactly the same. The models, configurations, exterior and interiors were hardly different. He was immediately relieved. He thought about it, and felt that he was more inclined towards BMW’s SUVs. They were larger, more stable and looked more impressive!

If he was buying, make it a good one!

X5 or X6? Which is better?

X6 look more stylish. It was sportier. X5 was much more stable and had an air of dominance.

Zhang Ye eyes swept over them several times. He had taken fancy to the X5. He pointed to the X5 far away at the display window, “How much is that?”

The female shop assistant hesitated slightly, “That model is not a conventional X5. You should be referring to the one over here.” She pointed at an exactly same looking black X5 beside her, “This one with a lower configuration is 804,000. There is ready stock available.”

Zhang Ye said, “The two are not the same, right?”

The female shop assistant smiled wryly “They look the same, but the one you pointed out earlier, that’s the bulletproof version of the X5. It’s the current year upgraded version of the bulletproof X5. The recommended selling price is 4,720,000. With a full configuration, it would be slightly above 5,000,000. It’s the most expensive BMW model here.”

Bulletproof vehicle?

Upgraded version?

There’s even the bulletproof X5 in this world?

When Zhang Ye heard that, he got excited. They had this over in his world, too. It was also released this year. He remembered that when he was lucky enough to have a ticket to see the International Security Equipment Expo at the Conference Center, a promotional video for the X5 bulletproof vehicle caught his attention. He swore at that time that if he ever became a superstar, he would buy one for himself. Now that his dream was right before his eyes, Zhang Ye was trembling!

Five million?

Zhang Ye clenched his teeth and forced himself to point toward the armored vehicle, “I will take that!”

“Ah?” The female shop assistant was dumbfounded, “Are you sure about that?”

“I am very sure. Do you have available stock?” Zhang Ye inquired.

“There’s no available stock, you have to place a reservation. We have to transfer the stock from another location. You can collect the car in about two days. It doesn’t take too long.” The female shop assistant, upon realising that Zhang Ye was serious about buying, became excited, too. This was the most expensive car in their shop and had been on display for several months without selling, even though there were a lot of curious viewers. She wouldn’t have thought that a car worth over five million would be sold by her, a rookie employee. She felt happy to death about the successful sale!

“Okay, then I will pay the deposit first. Please expedite the transfer of the car.” Zhang Ye exhilaratingly followed the shop assistant to make his payment.

This world’s right to obtain a license plate was also through a lottery. At least, the machine that did it was stricter than Zhang Ye’s world. The probability was very tiny, but there was a government policy that if any local family did not have any member who had a car under their name, they did not need to participate in the lottery the first time they bought a car. As such, Zhang Ye fulfilled that criteria.

Translator’s Note: Zhang Ye buying a bulletproof car was foreshadowed in Chapter 5, “Rolls Royce car? Can you not be so humorous!? Can you really not be so humorous!? If I don’t sit in a bulletproof car when I go out, what happens if I get targeted for assassination?”