The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Editor:Kurisu

"Wait, don\'t touch that! That\'s the Spring of a Drowned Woman!"

In a way, I truly was quite a nice guy.

If Adam actually drank that potion, not only would Margaret and Annie never forgive me, just imagining the thought of a female Adam was too much for me, which was why I hurriedly told him to stop.

"Spring of a Drowned Woman? The gender changing potion!?"

The biggest reaction didn\'t come from Adam who hurriedly tossed aside the potion bottle, but rather from Victoria, who had constantly maintained an expression of calmness and elegance.

I paused in surprise for a moment, but then recalled that when all that stuff had happened to Krose before, Victoria just happened to be there as well. Victoria had probably overheard the promise I made to Krose at the time.

And back then, even if the "female" Victoria saw all that and remembered it deeply, "she" wouldn\'t be able to express it. That was because it was the venerated Goddess of all dark elves, Lorci, who had transformed "him" into "her". Trying to cancel a divine punishment would be the equivalent of resisting divine will. That would have consequences too dire to bear for Victoria at the time.

And, at that time, Victoria was also Lorci\'s priestess. That was something she could only be if she was female. Dark elf society was matriarchal, and women held all the authority. Victoria was unable to give up the status and power that she would have as a female.

However, "he" had spent several hundred years as a male already, and only a few years in comparison as a female. Victoria would still mentally think of herself as male. Now that she heard of a chance that she might be restored to being male again, of course she would be overjoyed.

"Your Highness Roland, is this real? I can become a man again? This is so wonderful!"

Victoria immediately came up to me. Her soft and beautiful face was right before my eyes, and her faint rose scent even had hypnosis magic effects. She had become even more difficult to deal with than eight years ago. Meanwhile, behind her back, her older sister Diana was looking at me with a begging expression, indicating that she really wanted me to give my agreement.

"This isn\'t easy to deal with…"

It was indeed difficult to refuse the request of an old subordinate of mine, but I had already promised Krose, and it was almost time for her to arrive. This was why I placed the Spring of the Drowned Woman potion on the table. Although Victoria\'s situation was also quite pitiful, I had already made a promise to Krose…

"This potion is the Spring of the Drowned Woman potion. It\'s only capable of transforming a man into a woman. The Spring of the Drowned Man potion is the one that\'s capable of transforming a woman into a man…"

"Your Highness Roland, Your Highness Roland, I heard that you found a Spring of the Drowned Man potion! Where is it, where is it!?"

At this moment, Krose just happened to rush in with an incredibly big smile on her face. Her delight made her smile bloom like a flower as this wild elf kept smiling foolishly at me.

"I…"

I could only helplessly rub my head at this terrible timing. Perhaps this was all an elaborate prank on me by Fate itself. Or maybe my System was trying to set a pitfall for me after all?

[Not at all. Did you forget? These two "girls" are the only two people in the world with luck stat lower than yours. With such luck stat, do you think that Fate would easily allow them to cancel their curses? Relax, bad luck is just for the two of them, at least for now.]

When Krose saw Victoria here, she was happy at first. The two of them had the same problem, so they had quite a good relationship with each other. They would often write letters to each other, and talk about their own private problems. Of course Krose would be happy to see a good friend that she didn\'t expect to see here.

However, Krose noticed that her "good friend" had a hostile expression while looking at her. Wild elf Krose\'s face instantly paled as she just realized that the primary reason for their good relationship was that they had the exact same "problem", but right now, there was only one dose of the antidote in front of them.

"Even if we are just like sisters, this is the only thing I absolutely can\'t give up."

"Yes, indeed, Sister Krose. Let us have a fair competition."

Fair competition? Those seemed like such strange words for a dark elf to speak. I really couldn\'t understand at all, but I almost immediately understood what dark elves thought that the words "fair competition" meant.

"Your Highness Roland, I will give you 200,000 gold coins, 10,000 Justice Points, and 30 beauties from various elven tribes. Please rest assured, all of this is my personal property and perfectly legal. And if you have any special needs, please let me know. No matter if it\'s gold or treasures, or beastmen from the northern tundras, or mermaids from deep under the sea, I can satisfy any request that you may have!"

Alright, this was indeed quite fair. Victoria was directly attempting to bribe me.

Krose opened her mouth wide with an expression of disbelief. She was unable to say anything in the end, and could only helplessly look in my direction with a look of wanting to cry.

Victoria was the true leader of the dark elves, although not in name. Not only did dark elf society still have slavery, it was heavily ruled by religious authority and the concept of property. From a certain standpoint, it could be said that Victoria had control over all of dark elf society. Krose\'s meager amount of salary couldn\'t possibly compare the amount of wealth that Victoria possessed.

Also, this potion counted as my private property. Of course I could do whatever I wanted with it.

Krose had an expression of despair as she realized the difference in wealth. Tears were silently beginning to flow from her eyes. Meanwhile, Victoria had a delighted expression as she kept increasing her offer.

I shook my head. This was becoming a ridiculous joke. I had to say something.

"I promised Krose before already. Although it was only a verbal promise, I\'m not in the habit of breaking my promises."

"Cough, there\'s me (Harloys), Amelia, Elisa, and all your enemies that have suffered because of you… Are you certain that your words are convincing?"

"Hey, don\'t ruin my reputation. At the very least, they think that I\'m excellent at keeping my promises."

"You\'re not moved by the offer of beauties at all? And since when were you able to resist the allure of money? Haven\'t you been so poor recently that you can only leave IOUs for food money?"

"Hmph, you underestimate me too much… Fine, stop laughing at me in our soul connection. I do admit that I was slightly tempted. If Victoria had tried instead to secretly negotiate with me, I would have considered it, but since she\'s trying to bribe me so openly, I would gain the reputation of being a greedy elf-loving pervert if I agreed. Human society is quite different from dark elf society. Having such a bad reputation will make many things far more difficult."

I brought out the red potion and was about to hand it to Krose, who was so overjoyed that she burst into tears. Victoria\'s face instantly paled, but there was nothing that she could do.

But at this moment, Diana came over. She kneeled to me on one knee while imploring, "Your Highness Roland, Victoria is the only younger brother I have. I\'m begging you, I\'m willing to give you anything in order to obtain your magnanimity. Please, since I\'ve served you so loyally for so many years, please give my younger brother a chance to be a man!"

Ptui! What was with her phrasing! Give her younger brother a chance to be a man? If word of this got out, it would sound as if I was a pervert who was also gay! The guards outside were already secretly peeking at what was going on in here! Did everyone here really want to ruin my reputation that much!?

I became even angrier, but it was difficult for me to scold this loyal female knight of mine who was always so direct and honest. And Victoria seemed to notice that I was far weaker to the soft approach, so she suddenly kneeled as well. She took it even further as she started crying loudly while hugging my right leg.

"Your Highness, I\'m so pitiful, I\'m truly so pitiful! Nobody\'s understood my pain for so many years now…!"

Although Victoria was also gesturing with her eyes for Diana to also hug my other leg, that was too much for Diana. However, when Momo saw this situation, she instantly pounced on me. Not only was she hugging my left leg, she kept nudging her head ever more upwards while muttering some rather strange things.

"What a wonderful sensation. Touch, touch, squeeze, squeeze… If only I could lick it…"

\'Woman? Where is your honor as a knight? Even if you don\'t have any moral boundaries, shouldn\'t you at least have some shame?! No, wait, don\'t drool on me!\'

I would never go easy on a woman if the woman was Momo. I unhesitatingly kicked with my left leg, but suddenly discovered that I was unable to move my leg. Instead, Momo kept nudging ever higher up. Right before she was about to reach my crotch, I felt a sense of utter chilling disgust all over my body.

I took a deep breath, and then smiled. Momo saw that I smiled, so she also smiled. And then, she froze into ice.

My left leg had frozen together with Momo. However, this still felt far better than what I had just been feeling. I silently withdrew my right leg from Victoria\'s embrace, and crookedly walked over to my chair before sitting down in silence.

*Clang, clang, clang!*

The frozen dark elf knight made quite loud noises as she clattered against the floor when I walked. Momo still had her same foolish smile within the block of ice. Everyone watching this wanted to laugh, but didn\'t dare to.

Although I was losing a lot of face by walking like this with a dark elf knight frozen to my leg, my anger still had some use for keeping my authority in front of my old subordinates.

"Where\'s that brat Xueti? Didn\'t I tell him to come see me?"

Krose wiped her tears and shook her head.

"…He did come here, but he heard about the Spring of the Drowned Man from me, and he said that he wanted to go enjoy the hot springs in the volcano, and that he would come to visit Your Highness Roland later."

"That damned sly cow. Even though he\'s just a cow, how is he so sly?"

It would seem that just the news of the Spring of the Drowned Man was more than enough to put Xueti on guard. He had to have sent Krose ahead just to check the situation. This truly wasn\'t easy to deal with.

However, I didn\'t have the free time right now to worry about what the Tauren was doing. Even though this was clearly misfortune meant for the "two women", why did all of this seem to become my own misfortune as well? Just what did I do wrong here?

[Both of them have super negative luck stats, and you\'re not much better than they are. So much bad luck together will only summon even more misfortune. With them two together, it\'s only natural that they\'ll cause the people around them to suffer misfortune. You were simply unlucky to be around them.]

I felt more and more helpless now. I also felt even more that the two potions in my hands were just like hot potatoes.

Other things didn\'t matter as much, as I wouldn\'t care too much about what Victoria and Momo thought. However, not only was Diana so honest, she truly had been incredibly loyal to my cause. She had also helped to improve my reputation significantly. This was the first time that she had ever begged me for anything, and she was even willing to go to the extent to pay me anything that I wanted. If I rejected her, not only would this chill the hearts of my other subordinates, even I myself would feel quite bad about it.

This was a classical example of how it wouldn\'t at all feel bad to scam a really smart person, but scamming an honest person would require you to check your own morals.

"You guys should discuss it among yourselves. Just tell me the final result."

In the end, I decided to shirk responsibility and make them decide, but soon, I regretted this decision of mine which was simply stalling for time.

On that very same night, a certain prettiest dark elf in all of dark elf society snuck into my bedroom.

"Your Highness Roland, my dear, for the sake of \'that\', I\'m willing to give you the most precious thing of all to me. I know that you have really high requirements, but I am the secret ruler of all dark elves, and the best sacrifice that my species has to offer. I can satisfy any and all of your desires."

The "girl" was trembling as she started taking off her clothes. She had only revealed a delectable shoulder when I kicked her out with an awkward expression on my face.

"I have no interest in men! Even if you\'re only mentally a man! I\'m not gay!"

Then, on the next night, Diana came to my bedroom…

It was impossible for me to convince the female knight to leave, as she had an absolutely resolute will to sacrifice herself. She was stuck in my bedroom as if she had sprouted roots. As she was the strongest anti-Holy Knight in the world, her personal domain cancelled out my magic, and even I was unable to forcefully kick her out. Luckily, she was so honest and simple-minded that it was easy for me to fool her, if not convince her. In the end, we discussed the spirit of Law and knightly beliefs for the entire night. I successfully caused her to forget the mission that her younger brother had given to her. Finally, the next morning, she kept yawning as she walked out of my bedroom under the knowing looks of others.

On the third night, I had only fallen asleep for a little while when I heard screams coming from outside. Momo had fallen into a lightning trap that I had set outside my bedroom. I had Harloys toss up a soundproof barrier, and then continued sleeping for the rest of the night, even having a pleasant dream.

But, the result was terrifying. It was said that Momo screamed all night. For the first half of the night, she was screaming pitifully, but something… changed about the nature of her screams in the later half of the night. By next morning at breakfast, Momo was quite energetic and even declared that she had awakened to a new interest, drooling as she said so. She even kept discussing what it felt like to touch His Highness Roland\'s leg… My reputation was completely ruined.

Another contributing factor to ruining my reputation was that on the fourth night, Krose came in to my bedroom while severely trembling, wearing nothing but a skimpy white veil. She was just like the dark elves, trying to offer herself to me… And then I had to spend half the night explaining to Krose that it wasn\'t necessary to do so, and I kept consoling her as she cried. I finally brought her out of my bedroom when her emotions had somewhat calmed down…

But, the guards witnessed me bringing the crying Krose out of my room. Even though I hadn\'t done anything at all, at that moment, I truly wanted to kill the guards to silence them.

By the fifth day, okay, I was already known as the legendary "Seducer of Elves"…

I truly hadn\'t done anything to deserve such a nickname at all!