I’m Really a Superstar

In the cabin.

Zhang Ye’s voice was transmitted. “Please note that the plane is out of the danger zone. I repeat, the plane is out of the dangerous zone!

“Ah?”

“Look out the window!”

“We can’t see the sea anymore!”

“It has really flown up!”

“This voice. It’s…it’s Teacher Zhang Ye flying the plane?”

Dong Shanshan, who was using her phone to write her will, was dumbfounded upon hearing it!

The passengers erupted as they whined and howled with excitement. They could only express their hearts of joy, “We are saved! We are saved! Teacher Zhang is too awesome!”

He can write songs?

He can write novels?

He can be a radio host?

He can produce commercials?

He can write poetry, Buddhist verses and couplets?

He can write essays and create internet buzz phrases?

He knows kung fu?

He knows how to pick locks?

Now he even knows how to f**king fly a plane?

Hey! How multi-talented are you!?

The four year old girl was most excited, “Wah, Mom! Mom! Brother Superman is too great! Brother Superman has saved us all!”

……

In the cockpit.

Zhang Ye heard the commotion from outside and almost got carried away. As he flew the plane, he waved to the people behind me. He said heroically, “All of you can go out. Leave it to me in here!”

The old air stewardess said worriedly, “Are you alright?”

“What a joke, who am I!?” Zhang Ye began bragging.

The cabin crew youth was already completely impressed by Teacher Zhang Ye, so he said, “We can’t help much, so let’s not distract Zhang Ye’s flying. The more people there are, the more chaotic it becomes!”

“Right!”

“Teacher Zhang, please!”

After that, the people from inside came out and entered the cabin.

Zhang Ye was the only person left in the cockpit as he began to hum a melody to soothe his tense emotions.

……

Outside.

A few air stewardesses had found a place to sit down.

The fat air stewardess said with a sigh, “This Teacher Zhang sure is great.”

The old air stewardess said with some doubt, “Does he really know how to fly a plane?”

The old granny beside her suddenly said, “Oh I recalled something. Isn’t this young man the one who asked for an invoice in the airport halls? The staff gave him his itinerary and he still said the invoice was false because there was no scratch-it! It’s definitely him! He was wearing sunglasses just now. I was lining up just behind him!”

What?

Scratch-it?

The air stewardesses nearly planted their faces into the ground!

After recalling Zhang Ye’s previous words of stepping on the gas and changing gears, they really began to feel that Teacher Zhang was not reliable. Fly a plane? He must have blindly pressed the power button just now! A few people looked at the cockpit with fright as their hearts began to beat furiously! What sort of person were they getting to fly the plane? A person who was flying for the first time! A person who wanted to have a scratch-it in his itinerary! A person who was talking about stepping on the gas and switching to gear five on a plane! This pure layman controlled all their lives?

The old granny exclaimed and added on, “But that guy was drunk just now, and was saying alcohol-induced words, so maybe…he…”

The cabin crew youth wiped his sweat, “I feel like I should go up ahead and take another look.”

“I think so too.” The old air stewardess and company rushed to the cockpit.

……

The door opened.

People entered.

Zhang Ye turned back, “Why are all of you back in here?”

The thin air stewardess said in a panic, “Teacher Zhang, don’t joke with us. Your hosting skills are admirable, and your literary skills is peerless, but this is a passenger plane. There are a 100 lives on this plane, are you sure you can handle it?”

Zhang Ye said confidently, “Of course.”

The old air stewardess looked out the window, “Now where are we heading?”

Zhang Ye said without hesitation, “How would I know. We’ll just keep driving.”

“Ah?” The cabin crew youth was dumbfounded, “just keep driving? You don’t even know where you are heading and you dared to ask us to leave? Holy shit! I’ve seen bold people, but they were never that bold!” Previously when they saw Zhang Ye heroically pull up the plane, everyone felt reassured. Seeing him confidently ask them to leave, they thought this fellow was confident. Thankfully they had asked again, or they would not have known how they died!

“Isn’t this the instrument panel and the display screen?” The fat air stewardess said naively, “The air routes are fixed, so just follow the line and we will reach the airport!”

“Come, let everyone pitch in!” The old air stewardess said.

Zhang Ye glanced at them, “There’s no need for help. The critical thing is that two of the direction panels are broken. The same thing for the co-pilot’s side. It was all smashed during the scuffle!”

The cabin crew youth pointed and said, “Aren’t there a few dials here?”

Zhang Ye retorted and looked at him, “Do you know anything about them?”

“…No.” The cabin crew youth’s voice turned silent.

Zhang Ye nodded, “So everything has to rely on me. None of you can help.”

“You know?” The cabin crew youth’s eyes beamed with hope.

Zhang Ye said, “Of course. See that dial? Those numbers and the english alphabets beside it are…are…” After pausing for a while, he turned around to carry on controlling the plane, “Alright, actually I don’t know either!”

Air stewardesses, “…”

Cabin crew youth, “…”

Zhang Ye had originally thought that by eating the passenger plan experience books, he would be able to control the plane, but only now did he realize that he only knew tens of the hundreds of knobs and switches in the plane. A few of the display panels that he knew were broken, and he did not know the rest. Only then did he realize how complex flying a plane was. With the knowledge from his six experience books, he could be said to be a novice who had just one step in the door. It was not enough. If not, why would pilots need to undergo years of training? Ah, he probably needed to eat tens of passenger plane skillbooks to catch up to professional pilots. The experience from six skillbooks was too little!

But what could he do?

He only had that little bit of experience, and could only use the existing conditions!

The old air stewardess’ lips turned white, “The communications equipment are broken, and the instruments are damaged. With no way to determine our location, how are we to land?”

The fat air stewardess stayed calm and raised an idea, “Is there any open space nearby?”

The cabin crew youth scratched his head, “We don’t even know where we are. There’s no navigation at all. And there’s no land. This flight path is either sea or city. You don’t expect us to land in the city, right? Not only will our plane crash, we would cause more casualties. We need to find an airport!”

The fat air stewardess looked at her watch, “According to the time, we shouldn’t be too far from Shanghai.”

Another air stewardess from behind the old air stewardess said, “Keep trying to make contact with the ground. If we are near a city, maybe the cell phone signal will be stronger.”

The air stewardess responded and tried to make a call again.

The old air stewardess carried on, “Who has a way to determine the locations of airports? Should we fly at a low altitude to search for a path? Is there enough gas?”

“There’s still enough gas, but not by much.”

“We can’t fly in low altitudes. Hitting a bunch of birds can cause the plane to crash!”

“Is there an instruction manual? To see how the compass dial is used?”

The situation was urgent as everyone rushed to give an opinion. But all their ideas were very rigid and traditional.

Only Zhang Ye had an open mind. He noticed a shadow pass by him, and immediately bent his back, “Don’t say another word! Silence! I have a way!”

“What way?” Everyone looked over. But after the “steeping on the gas and shifting gears” and the “itinerary scratch-if” incidents, the cabin crew still remained skeptical with Teacher Zhang Ye’s words!

“Look!” Zhang Ye pointed to the front.

“See what?” The few of them immediately looked up.

The next second, the cabin crew saw a plane not far away. From the size, it was also a passenger plane. In the direction they were heading, they were on the same route as them. Shanghai was one of the top-ranked cities, so there were countless numbers of aircraft taking off and landing nearby. Because of the near-crash from before, their flight path had been messed up. So meeting another passenger plane was not rare!

Zhang Ye seemed to have found his savior and immediately turned on the emergency contact frequency. He did not care if the pilot of the other plane could hear him. The words he immediately said made people nearly vomit blood. They heard Zhang Ye say in a especially easygoing and casual manner, “Hey, bro. Can I get some directions. How do I get to Hong Qiao airport?”

That feeling was like asking some old man on the road casually, “Grandpa, how do I get to the train station? Head towards the east at the next junction? Thanks!”

But the other passenger plane did not respond. They did not manage to make contact at all.

The old air stewardess thought that if the pilot from that plane had heard those words, he would have vomited blood. Who the f**k has seen a plane ask another plane for directions!?